Life and more

So this is happening. Family scripture stories at bedtime...read by Daddy! <3

I think it is the most awesome thing ever! <3

Hopefully we can keep up the momentum.

I will admit that the LDS scripture app makes it so much easier because you can login and pull up kids scripture stories from all the standard work.

We are starting the Book of Mormon.

Still in Nephi, but working on it. We had started in one of the old soft cover scripture story picture books the church put out, but Daddy's iPad is much more convenient...and they have changed the images!

As Matt pointed out, Nephi doesn't look quite so buff anymore.

Toria is trying a new sleep med and just asked to go to bed early!! Hallelujah! Hopefully this is a good sign that it is working.

She has been having a tough time lately and I am not sure why.

We've tried new focus drugs, but the results have been a disaster.

I truly believe getting her sufficient sleep is the key to helping her regulate better.

Well, that and helping her learn to co-regulate with me.

It never used to be a problem, but there was that one dang school...after that everything when to pot.

Every time I think we can start to move past it, it seems like the trauma rears it's ugly head again.

Her therapist actually suggested partial days or home school until she is regulated.

Toria thrives on human interaction and contact with crowds. I am not sure home school is a good option for her, but I also need to find a way to get her regulated...whether it is co-regulation or regulation by herself.

In all honesty, the latter would be best, but she must master the former first.

Life is crazy. Danny is adopted and we are looking at re-opening our license in Utah for more adoptions.

I can only partially explain, but there are two more kids. I don't know if they are both foster care adoptions or not.

I know one of them is a girl for sure. I am not sure if she has been born though.

Toria was not alone in the children's room at the temple on the day she was sealed to us. Her sister appeared to her. They sat and put puzzles together.

It had such a profound impact on Toria that she did not want to leave the temple because it meant she must leave her sister behind.

I don't share this often because things like this are not to be taken lightly. They are precious and rare.

The other child feels like a girl between the ages of six and eight.

Some of you know we have tried to find her before. I really thought we had and then found out we were wrong.

We didn't have a bed for her when her caseworker finally called. I was devastated.

Later I found out she went to another family and had gone from terrible tantrums which lasted for hours to becoming violent.

I always wondered if it might have been different if she had been allowed to come to my home.

We had bonded during the time I spent with her at the crisis nursery.

The delay was that her brothers were having massive problems in their adoptive placement.

I was very understanding and knew we needed to wait for the cw to get it worked out, but by then Miss L needed a behavior coach.

Once her coaching was done, I was called right away.

I still can't help wondering if sending her to me without delay could've prevented her decline.

No one comes to see you in the crisis nursery unless it is a mommy. I think she knew I was a mommy and she wanted to come home with me. I wonder if my visit actually triggered her need for a behavior coach because she was not allowed to go home with me yet.

I hope Miss L never felt unloved or unwanted because I could not bring her home. For whatever reason, she was not meant to be my daughter. I wish it had made it hurt less, but it didn't.

Toria was anxious to meet her, but got two brothers instead. One she bonded with immediately and the other one was never meant to stay.

God's plans for our lives are amazing.

I have no doubt He knows what He is doing, even if we do not.

Watching Him bring us Toria was beyond anything I have ever experienced in my entire life.

We are yet again standing on the crux of a new adventure.

Only the Lord knows what will happen next.

Our lives here in Utah are good. No, better.

Matt got a raise and he loves his new school.

I am finally starting to get Toria's med problems worked out. I knew we couldn't get it worked out in Snowflake. Yet another thing I cannot explain.

Danny is growing like a weed. He was deemed to be 90% on height for four year olds when he went in for his birthday check up.

Me, my health is starting to improve as well.

My mom helped me get on some vitamins which seem to really help my energy level. Being predisposed to illness which kills one's energy level is for the birds.

I have read that my auto-immune disease can be linked to damaged gut bacteria. I have read that autism is the same problem. I have been reading that a lot of the health problems we experience these days are the result of damaged gut bacteria.

It sounds crazy, right? Or...does it?

Think about it for a minute. I read up on terminator seeds a few years ago and found out that the bacteria which is used to prevent the seeds from germinating a second time actually live and grow in the human abdomen after being eaten.

Ewww, right?

This was an actual study and not some homeopathy blog. We are talking WHO or NIH or one of those guys!!

The end result? They said they didn't know yet, but it seems that we are currently seeing the results with the increase in food sensitivities and auto-immune disease.

So, I decided to try making water kefir.

It works pretty good, but mine is super prolific.

My sourdough gluten-free starter, not so much.

I finally threw it out because I wasn't pleased with the texture. It was just way too dense.

I don't know which things are the biggest contributors to my increase in energy, but I am sure not going to knock it.